Babylon Bee (Satire)

ISIS Claims Responsibility For Reflecting Pool Algae

KABUL — The notorious terrorist organization ISIS has claimed responsibility for an algae attack that has disrupted the beautiful blue color of the Reflecting Pool.

Posted on 20 June 2026 | 3:32 pm

Obama Library Cruelly Disenfranchises Millions Of Black Americans By Requiring Photo ID For Entry

CHICAGO, IL — In a cruel denial of basic human rights, the Obama Presidential Library has disenfranchised millions of black Americans by requiring photo identification for entry.

Posted on 20 June 2026 | 1:51 pm

Cringe: Out-Of-Touch Company Posts Pride Logo Like It's 2014 Or Something

PITTSBURGH, PA — Local company Stan's Paper Mill proudly posted on X, formerly Twitter, a message celebrating Pride Month, apparently ignorant of the fact the year is no longer 2014.

Posted on 20 June 2026 | 12:22 pm

Trump Unveils New Air Force One Helicarrier

CAMP SPRINGS, MD — At Joint Base Andrews on Friday, President Donald Trump unveiled the next Air Force One, a massive battle-ready airborne aircraft carrier, which he affectionately called a "Helicarrier."

Posted on 19 June 2026 | 6:22 pm

NASCAR Celebrates Pride Month With First All-Subaru Race

SAN DIEGO, CA — NASCAR will celebrate Pride month this year by featuring its first all-Subaru race at the Navy 250 in San Diego.

Posted on 19 June 2026 | 3:53 pm

Experts Issue Dire Warning That A.I. Has Now Learned How To Use The Semicolon

U.S. — A.I. has reportedly learned to use the semicolon; now experts are sounding the alarm.

Posted on 19 June 2026 | 2:58 pm

So-Called 'World’s Greatest Dad' Not Even In Top Five

CLAREMONT, NH — Local man Roger Taft, despite owning several mugs declaring him to be the world's greatest dad, has reportedly not even cracked the top five.

Posted on 19 June 2026 | 2:19 pm

British Tourists Pleasantly Surprised By Quality Of American Food, Lack Of Rape Gangs

U.S. — British tourists visiting the United States have reportedly been surprised by the quality of American food, and also the fact there are no violent hordes of rape gangs roaming the countryside.

Posted on 19 June 2026 | 1:28 pm

'Now Witness The Firepower Of This Fully Armed And Operational Battle Station,' Cackles Obama

CHICAGO, IL — Seated upon his spinning throne chair, a cackling former President Barack Obama invited guests to witness the firepower of his now fully-armed and operational battle station.

Posted on 19 June 2026 | 12:45 pm